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Showing posts from June, 2010

Waiting for Togo(t)

Mocking the play "Waiting for Godot" in college theatre class, my classmates and I performed a silly parody of waiting for to go during which we were waiting for various things and how we handled it. This week, while waiting for word about a breast biopsy, I thought often about how difficult it is to stay in the moment and just be where we are without projecting thoughts into the future. Babies and pets are good at this, but me, not so much. I profess to have faith in God and try to live as such but when the shit hits the fan and I am tested, apparently I still have more work to do. This week was a test for sure. I found myself wavering back and forth between the worst case scenerio and the absolute best, hesitant to embrace either. As though we can really prepare for the worst, I felt that I needed to be armed and ready for anything. I know better. We can never really prepare and be completely emotionally ready for bad news. When my daughter was alive, I used to go…

To Mammogram or not to Mammogram?

O.K. since my last post I feel that I have reached a bit of a conclusion as to the purpose of all of this focus on the boobies. It was not at all a coincidence that I was asked to host the Breast Cancer Awareness Hotline where I was able to talk extensively to a breast surgeon who was also a cancer survivor. She reiterated the importance of regular testing for women, emphasizing that a great majority of her patients were under the age of 50. Ugh! Scary stuff. Really scary. And fear is the overall emotion whenever the "C" word is mentioned.
A few days after this TV appearance, I had my own regular yearly mammogram which resulted in additional screening by sonogram and a recommendation of biopsy for calcifications in one breast. Now, I have been a good girl and for the past year I have gone back for diagnostic mammograms for these little flecks of calcium every six months. Well, I am not convinced that this is the best route but apparently it is my job to investigate.…

What a week! Or, what is God trying to tell me?

Well, this week I had a couple of nice gigs, hosting and voiceing a video and working again on ABC 7 as Host of another health related phone bank. The phone bank allows viewers to call in with questions about a particular topic. Both went really well and were a lot of fun. Meanwhile, I was scheduled for a couple of things that I had been rather dreading - the mammogram which was a couple of months overdue and gum surgery. The mammogram is always terrifying to me. I get so mad at myself for being so frightened because so many women have actually had to deal with the big C and I admire their courage so much. Having been called back for calcification watch on the left breast, I knew there was something to look at. Thankfully (maybe) I had a very diligent radiologist who looked at my films and she wanted to take a closer look by ultrasound at the other breast. The two women in the room (tech and radiologist) agreed that I had dense breasts and the area of concern was normal for me…